Bear Pause: Adam Dachis '02

Adam Dachis Bear Pause

Adam Dachis '02 lives and works as a technology writer in Los Angeles, but to save time he programmed his website to write for itself. Adam and the algorithm are currently co-creating a video game. If that's the strangest thing you've read today, tomorrow will surely surprise you.

Q: Aside from necessities, what is one thing could you not go a day without?
A: I'd prefer a computer with internet access for efficiency, but I'd be satisfied with a pen and paper, so long as it never runs out.

Q: Is there anything you wished would come back into fashion?
A: Compassion

Q: If you had a warning label, what would yours say?
A: Don't ask a question if you're not prepared to get the complete answer.

Q: What’s the weirdest talent you have?
A: All my skills are normal, but everything I do with them is weird. One thing I think is weird is how accurately I can recall vocal characteristics. I can change the way my voice sounds very easily because of this.

Q: In what ways are you the same as your childhood self?
A: In every way I was told not to be. I just figured out how to make people comfortable with it.

Q: What teacher inspired you the most? How?
A: My fourth grade teacher, Elle Becker. She didn't care how I learned. She was just happy that I wanted to.

Q: If they made a movie of your life, what would it be about and which actor would you want to play you?
A: I would want the actor to be someone who looked nothing like me but could portray the way I am. I wouldn't want anyone to think about how the person looked, and I wouldn't be particular about gender. It's good enough if they can portray me. If someone would make a movie about me, though, I would hope they'd wait another 20 years. Then it will be about something good. I'm just not sure what that will be yet.

Q: What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?
A: Everything I cooked before the age of six.

Q: Tell us about a unique or quirky habit of yours.
A: I allow myself to eat 90 Totino's Pizza Rolls (cheese) per year, with 45 in the first half and 45 in the second half. I think this is especially weird because they have no redeeming qualities as food, and I don't enjoy any aspect of eating them except that they remind me of an old friend, and that makes me happy.

Q: If you had your own talk show, who would your first three guests be?
A: I do have my own talk show because you can make anything you want these days. I don't think you'd really want to know who my first three guests were because I interview some very weird people. 

Q: It has been said that everyone gets 15 minutes of fame. What happened during your 15 minutes?
A: I'm in the process of experiencing that. I don't like it. Everyone feels like they know you — and they kind of actually do know you — but you have no idea who they are. That's not to say people aren't very nice. I've been very lucky in that regard. My audience isn't enormous or anything, but it's big enough to actually affect people's lives. That's a lot of responsibility, and I hadn't thought of that when I decided to start writing for the internet. Then, all of a sudden, I'm picking up takeout and someone wants to talk to me because something I wrote affected them. One day nobody's looking at you and the next you never know who is. I never wanted fame in the first place, but I didn't expect what it would feel like to be seen by so many people in so many different ways. The upside is that most are really kind and, given the world we live in, it's gratifying to have the opportunity to see that thousands of good people exist.

Q: If someone rented a billboard for you, what would you put on it?
A: "I love you." I think people need to hear that from someone every day.